By Steve Krutzler / 07:01, 17 November 2005 / People

Shawn Piller is known to STAR TREK fans as a writer of "Journey's End," "Death Wish," and "The Q and the Grey," and as the son of TNG and VOY producer Michael Piller and his partner in THE DEAD ZONE and WILDFIRE. Michael passed away this month after a long fight with cancer and his life was celebrated Sunday at a memorial service in Hollywood. Many figures from Michael's professional life shared thoughts with the assembled guests - Rick Berman, Ira Steven Behr, John de Lancie among others. Shawn remembered his father's life personally and professionally, as the two were intertwined for father and son, and he wanted to share his eulogy with the fans by publishing it online.

Eulogy for Michael Piller -- by Shawn Piller

Thank you all for coming. I know some of you flew in to be here from other states and other countries. It is with great pride that I stand before you today to honor my father, my partner, my mentor, and my friend. Michael would not want today to be out about his passing. He'd want it to about his life and the meaning that can be derived from how he lived it.

So what was Michael's life about? That phrase "what is it about" was one of his favorites. All the writers he's worked with here know it well. It's a difficult a question, the kind of question philosophers and poets have pondered through the ages. For Michael it was easy. For Michael it was about family. Not just his nuclear family, or extended family and friends, but about the human family. He would want us today to find the meaning, the message, the lesson in his passing. To find hope. The things he did, the lives he touched and the example he tried to lead by. My father was a leader, make no mistake. He felt the moral obligation to make this place better than he found it. He did that through his writing, his parenting, and his friendships. He felt the weight of that responsibility deeply and, like the captain of a starship who had people's lives in his hands, Michael took that responsibility seriously in both his personal and his professional life.

Being his son who, for the last six years, was his producing partner and often writing partner, I have had a unique perspective on a man you know and love. The audio from our company logo Piller2 reflects it best. It follows in the esteemed footsteps of "sit Ubu, sit" and Letterman's "Worldwide Pants". The voice over the logo, if you haven't heard it" which you probably haven't since both out shows are on cable. (Sorry. Kidding, Jeff, Kate.) It's Michael's and my voices over picture saying, "Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. You're grounded." That pretty much sums up our relationship through elementary school, high school and college "til now. And if he were here I'd probably be grounded now for giving this speech.

My father and I struggled to find the perfect message for our company Piller2 to embody. Two Pillers, squared. Us exponentially. Like it wasn't enough to tell the community "hey, it's a family business here." But we had to go that extra mile, saying at least one of us is pretty good at math" which is important when you're going into business with someone, we thought. The irony about that logo is it actually became harder to win arguments with my father as I got older, as goes the adage "the older I get, the smarter my father gets." I know some of you have had that same kind of complicated relationship in the writers' room. I won't mention any names, but Brannan Braga's right here.

Most people don't know this, but I was into Star Trek way before my father was. I was in junior high school and my bedtime was, like, 11pm which was way too early for a kid in my position with the ladies" This was an old argument we used to have and I was grounded many times for pushing it. The original Star Trek series would come on at midnight on channel 13, I think, and I just had to watch it. So I'd put a towel under my door so Michael couldn't see the light from the TV from his room. By the way, Brent, this is why you never had a TV in your room. Sorry about that.

At first I was into Star Trek for the short skirts on female crewmembers, but then I realized the real magic of Star Trek. How it could transcend the "now" and force you to think about the future which Michael was always trying to get me to do. There's a lot more to Star Trek than that, of course, but the point of this story is that I was into the original Star Trek series and, at the time, my father wasn't. This is not about credit. I'm not taking credit for getting Michael into Star Trek. I'm just saying"

My real point is that, when The Next Generation came on, I made him sit down with me and watch it. It became the first TV show as a father and son we watched together" besides Baywatch which was years later and really not as good. Some fathers watch football or baseball with their sons. We watched Star Trek. I remember watching that first episode together; I could see Michael just got it immediately. There was a sparkle in his eye. Finally, there was another bald guy as uptight as him. He was home.

In the long Hollywood tradition of nepotism, Michael gave me my first break in the business. It came in the form of a few scripts he had me read. I was eight years old. We read aloud as a family The Dukes of Hazard. Me having dyslexia and, thus, trouble reading when I met Michael, he created this family ritual that connected us all and helped my sister and I become stronger readers.

Michael was a program executive at CBS at the time and knew it was my favorite show. It wasn't the show so much as it was Daisy Duke" which he found out later when he took me to set for the first time. I remember him picking up this huge fake rock that was sitting in the middle of the soundstage. I was like "oh my god, my dad's the strongest man in the world." Then, I met Bow and Luke, which was pretty cool, and then I got to sit in the General Lee, also cool. Then Daisy Duke came around the corner. She was in full Daisy gear: tied top, short shorts and these dark stockings" which I now know make your legs look tan and perfect on film. Of course, I didn't know that at eight years old, so I kinda freaked and hid behind my father. I was pretty devastated that Daisy had plastic robot legs, an experience that prepared me for being around actors, so much so, in fact, that I married one. However, she is forbidden from wearing nylons of any kind. (Although I am a fan of those clippie ones.)

Michael was a few years younger than I am now when he married my mother and instantly became a father to these two strange kids. Me growing up with just women around, I desperately wanted a male figure around to teach me "guy things" about sports, shaving my face, standing up to pee.

I accepted him immediately. My sister, on the other hand, wasn't so easily convinced and was like, "who's this guy?" Michael eventually won her over with his love and unwavering dedication to her and he became our father. We were a family. As a family we had all the challenges all families have, but Michael taught us how to be a family. A family with a strong foundation of trust, and love, and togetherness.

Sometimes people were surprised to learn that Michael was not my biological father, since we looked so much alike. When I was 14 years old, Michael asked me if I wanted him to adopt me and have him become my legal father and take his name. Of course, I loved him as a father and said yes. We saw the lawyer and signed the paperwork and I got a new birth certificate. This was not only a wonderful symbol of our bond, but was a relief since, when I was born, my mother and biological father Larry Broms couldn't agree on a first name. Shawn or Shane or Moonshadow? They couldn't decide. Even on the way to the hospital, nothing. Imagine trying out for little league and being called out by the name from your birth certificate to make sure you're the right age for that division. "Baby Boy Broms? Baby Boy Broms, you're up next." So, becoming a Piller was not only an honor, but saved me years of therapy. My wife still calls me by my birth first name, Baby, which is nice.

As you know, my father was a shy man. Didn't like parties. He was a family man. He always put family first. He would wake up very early and write so he could be done with work in time to be home for dinner. Now that I'm out in the same world, I now know what an amazing accomplishment that truly is. I can honestly say my father was always there for my mother, my sisters and me. Always.

Michael's humility and unpretentiousness was a thing I didn't always understand. When he started doing very well I was like "Dad, come on. You're driving a light blue Toyota Camry?" He listened to me even then, by the way. So the next year, he gave that car to my mother and bought himself a dark blue Toyota Camry. He turned to me and said, "Okay, now we're the two-Camry family. Deal with it." He wasn't cheap, he was just practical. When I was 16 and desperate for a car, Michael made me a deal. He said, "you get a 4.0 grade point average and the Camry is yours." I had to have it. You can't be 16 in L.A. without a car. Even if it is a light blue Toyota Camry. I got focused on school and got those A's and that light blue Camry, eventually, got me through high school and college and to my first television pitch.

It was to Jeri Taylor at Star Trek. Michael had started the WGA writers' internship program there, which was perfect for a college friend of mine who had just graduated from the film program at USC, where I went at the time. As a woman she was eligible for the writers' internship and, thus, a pitch at the end of her six-week term. She asked me for help, my first collaboration and we sold it. This led to my second sale and my first co-authorship with my father on a "Q" episode for Star Trek Voyager.

Michael was a mentor, a patient teacher. He taught me where to find the spicy mustard at Dodger Stadium. He taught me that being honest is actually easier. He taught me that you had to earn things in life, especially respect. He taught me about bravery and grace during the biggest battle of his life as he fought cancer. Ironically, Michael won an Emmy in the 1960's in Chicago for a documentary he produced about Living with Cancer. It was the first of its kind when cancer wasn't talked about much. He was always teaching. Michael taught us about selflessness as he was there for Brent, my mother and me, even as he fought daily for his life. I shouldn't leave out my mother Sandra's story, whose strength, boundless love and affection was what completed Michael and fueled him throughout their marriage right until the end. I watched in amazement as she served as the one that really took care of Michael when he needed it the most. Something that she did with the love and care like only she could.

Here's an example of how Michael was always thinking about his family even when he was in pain. He wrote in an email to Brent a few months before he passed.


Michael: I want my life to be meaningful, Brent.

Michael: And that starts with you.

Michael: I ask you to honor our relationship. Whatever happens to me.

Michael: I don't want to die.

Michael: But if I do, I want to know that our time together has made a difference to you.

Michael: That it will inspire you.

Brent: it does

Michael: That's all I ask. And I know how sad and depressed you would be. How overwhelming something like this is. But it must not defeat you.


And later a few weeks, before he passed...


Brent: hey, dad.. I noticed you seemed happier today. Are you feeling better than usual?

Michael: I feel "centered" for the first time since the Television broke.

Brent: oh, I see

Michael: I know it's crazy

Brent: it's funny. But I get it

Michael: I want so much to feel better - it's hard though - leaning the wrong way can make my neck sore.

Michael: If I'm more sore in the morning, it may seem like I'm unhappy

Brent: yeah. I was thinking about it today, and I thought that if you had never gotten that second surgery, things might be better. I could be wrong, but I guess there's no going back now

Brent: I don't know if that made any sense

Michael: If I didn't have that surgery, I wouldn't be here now

Brent: really?

Brent: it's just so weird that everything they've done hasn't been working

Brent: like everything

Michael: But losing my ability to speak and swallow food made this a lot harder

Brent: yeah, and it's not fair at all. I can't even imagine

Michael: I'm glad you said that, Brent, because it really is the truth and it's important you understand it

Michael: Life - and this disease - ISN'T ALWAYS FAIR

Brent: I just don't get why this happened to us

Michael: No matter what the outcome is - and it may not be fair - we have to do our best - every day of our lives - and make our family and our world as good as we can

Michael: Why this happened to us? There's no answer for that. But look, something happens to everyone. Think of people who have been abused or who've lost their sight "" or so many other things.

Brent: I know

Brent: it just sucks!

Michael: Leadership in the face of adversity is where our heroes come from.

Michael: I have - occasionally - been a hero that way

Michael: But I am inspired by great men (and women) who overcome these things that just suck


Michael never took the easy way in life or in his writing. He was always looking for that deeper meaning and higher path. He didn't easily solve problems with a gun in his shows, or let his characters get by without growing through tackling some moral and ethical dilemma. Michael felt a huge sense of responsibility for what he put on television knowing how it could influence the world through its message. Michael was a true romantic. This coupled with Roddenberry's optimistic vision of the future, which Michael wholeheartedly embraced, was a powerful combination for a writer and I believe it is what made Michael's work stand out.

People would ask me, what's it like working with your father? The truth is "" as I've discovered by reading emails and talking to his friends and colleagues whom I never had the pleasure of working with "" that their experiences were a lot like my own. Working with Michael was exciting, challenging, and felt safe, like a family. In my case, it was I was family. I guess, when you boil it down, that is what it was about for Michael. Michael said, "I see the faces of the people I love in the characters I write." He wrote about all of us, all of you. His friends and his family. It was his way of telling us how he felt about us, the world and himself. He did it to give us hope, and say to us all the things he couldn't say to us in person. And for him, that's what it was about.