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Unforgettable File Photo || Mission Log Forget This
Airdate: April 22, 1998 Written by: Greg Elliot and Michael Perricone Directed by: Garak (Andrew Robinson) In short: Ugh, a boring story, bad acting, and those plot holes... Brief Summary: Chakotay falls in love with a woman... the same woman, apparently. Who knows! Review:Blech. Let's just put it this way in some vault deep somewhere. This one just reeked. Uninspired, uninteresting, and uninvolving. A mess of a plot, bad acting, and (shiver) a very bad romance. My friend and I were having a ball coming up with off color comments to describe what was going on. I won't say them, but it was the most fun I've had watching Voyager ever. Ok, one joke. Let's just say it involves the term "smoking the peace pipe." Many have speculated that Voyager writers think up nifty ideas and toss them up on the screen, thinking that such ideas would be enough to carry a show. They speak the truth. This episode certainly had a nifty idea, but oh Lord the plot holes! Where did these cloaked people take their dumps during these two weeks on the ship? Did they lay cloaked turds? Why oh why did Janeway let them put a virus in her computer? And whatever happened to just *gasp* erasing the specific records? How did it erase any trace of Kellin anyway? And how do the lack of pheromones make you lose memories? Memories aren't THAT sensory based. Oh, and Janeway was back to "Random Thoughts" form helping the baddies hunt down runaways. Go, go, Federation. Another manifestation of the uninspired writing was the lousy, lousy dialogue. Remember that line where the new and improved Kellin tells Chakotay that he is indeed attractive. Ugggh. I won't spell out the problems to you further, because I know you don't want to read them and, suprise surprise, I didn't care to watch to watch it again. It was that bad, and I had a 20 page paper to write. But the lovey dovey talk made me cringe, as did the usual spate of technobabble. And it didn't have a funny joke! The Tuvok/Chakotay scene where Tuvok said Kellin could help Neelix just rehashed two jokes: the Neelix is a bad cook one and the Tuvok doesn't like Neelix one. God, the writers are cannibalizing their own work. Maybe a good actor could have made it worked. Robert Beltran is not a good actor. Way too reserved, way too mumbling, way too wooden. Oh, I can be wooden, but I don't have this staged feel to my conversation. Don't believe me? Rewatch where Chakotay and Kellin talked in the mess hall about her credibility. Told ya. Beltran needs to start cussing and getting angry as he was in that Vibe magazine interview. Won't matter, though: he's the worst acting first officer Trek has ever had. And that includes Majel Barrett. Another manifestation... the plot was sooo predictable. I had read the spoilers. My friend Greg hadn't, and he had the whole episode predicted by the second commercial. It was that predictable and that uninspired. We knew it would be a tragedy with no long term impact; at least keep us guessing on the way. With all this out the window, they could have at least sold us on the romance. Nope. I have no idea why Chatokay and Kellin fell in love. Kellin found him attractive from the start, blech, and I never quite understood what made Chakotay fall for her in the first place. There needs to be resonance. A moment together, a conversation where they learn they have similar ideas or interests. Frankly, the relationship seemed physical only, not something as the commercial hyped, "Worth dying for." It's a shame, because the nifty plot had potential. Had they made Kellin's motives a little ambiguous, or her situation more dire, or just given us a reason to like her, I could have become emotionally attached to this show. Since the personal connection between two characters we love wasn't here as it was in "Attached" or "His Way," we needed a dilemma... or, or, something! Anything! Having Kellin just taken away didn't surprise me at all and had no resonance. So, I pronounce this garbage. Congratulations "The Raven," "Resurrection," "Who Mourns for Morn?" and "Concerning Flight!" You have company. Had I not been so kind, "Vis a Vis" might be there too. Oh well, that's why they made "Demons" I guess. Some short takes: -Kellin looked like a nymph. Old Kes outfit? - Why paper? Can't Chakotay record it aloud? -Virginia Madsen was an okay actress... I mean, look at her filmography. She ain't that great people! - When was the last time a shuttle exploded? Rating: F Next week: Holodoc deconstructs falling stars
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